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Love Isn't Blind... Nor Is It Delusional...

Updated: May 31

In relationships, love isn't about being blind to reality or delusional about expectations. It's essential to have a clear, realistic view of what a partnership entails. Let's break down what it means to be delusional in a relationship using one of my favorite sayings: "Don't be delulu!"


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What It Means to Be Delusional in a Relationship

 

  1. Unrealistic Expectations: Delusion in relationships often starts with unrealistic expectations. Many people, especially women, fall into the trap of expecting a fairytale romance without acknowledging the effort required to build a healthy relationship. They might envision a partner who is perfect in every way, without flaws or shortcomings. This can lead to disappointment and frustration when reality doesn't match the fantasy.


  2. Financial Fantasies: A common delusion is the expectation that a partner, typically the man, should be a financial provider with unlimited funds. Some women believe their beauty and body are enough to contribute to the relationship, while the man should bear all financial responsibilities. This outdated notion overlooks the importance of mutual effort and contribution, both financially and emotionally, in a partnership.


  3. Entitlement and Dependency: Delusional thinking can also manifest as a sense of entitlement. Expecting a partner to fund extravagant lifestyles, shopping sprees, trips, and social activities without contributing equally creates an imbalance. Relationships thrive on mutual respect and shared responsibilities, not on one-sided dependency.


  4. Ignoring Red Flags: Being delusional means ignoring the red flags and warning signs in a relationship. It's essential to recognize when things aren't right and address issues head-on. Pretending problems don't exist or believing they will magically disappear is a delusion that can lead to more significant issues down the road.


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What Causes Delusion in Relationships?

 

  1. Cultural Influences: Society often promotes unrealistic ideals of romance through movies, TV shows, and social media. These portrayals can create false expectations about what a relationship should look like, leading to delusion.


  2. Insecurity and Low Self-Esteem: People with low self-esteem may cling to delusional fantasies as a way to feel better about themselves. They may believe that being with a 'perfect' partner will validate their worth.


  3. Fear of Reality: Facing the truth about a relationship can be scary. Some people choose delusion over reality to avoid dealing with the discomfort and potential pain of addressing real issues.


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How Delusion Hurts Relationships

 

  1. Unmet Expectations: When expectations are based on delusion, they are often unmet, leading to disappointment, resentment, and conflict.


  2. Lack of Growth: Delusional thinking prevents personal and relational growth. It keeps individuals stuck in unrealistic patterns, hindering the development of a healthy, mature partnership.


  3. Erosion of Trust: Ignoring red flags and avoiding difficult conversations can erode trust over time. Trust is the foundation of any strong relationship, and without it, the relationship can crumble.


Whoever Said "Love Is Blind" Clearly Had...

 

Whoever said "Love is blind" clearly had a blindfold on and missed the memo that love requires seeing things as they are. Love isn't about ignoring reality; it's about accepting and embracing it. True love involves recognizing and appreciating your partner's strengths and weaknesses, understanding that no one is perfect, and working together to build a strong, healthy relationship.


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"Don't Be Delulu!" - Embrace Reality

 

To avoid being delusional, it's crucial to embrace reality and cultivate a partnership based on mutual respect, shared goals, and realistic expectations. Here are some tips:

 

  • Communicate Openly: Have honest conversations about your expectations, needs, and desires. Transparency helps build a solid foundation.

 

  • Share Responsibilities: Both partners should contribute to the relationship in various ways, including emotionally, financially, and practically.

 

  • Set Realistic Goals: Understand that no relationship is perfect. Set achievable goals and work together to overcome challenges.

 

  • Recognize Your Value: Bring more than just beauty to the table. Cultivate your skills, talents, and passions to contribute meaningfully to the relationship.

 

Final Thoughts

 

Love isn't blind, nor is it delusional. It's about seeing your partner for who they are and building a relationship based on reality, not fantasy. So, remember: "Don't be delulu!" Let's strive for healthy, balanced relationships where both partners bring their best to the table and work together towards a fulfilling future.

 
 
 

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"Love Isn't Blind, Nor Is It Delusional."

~Tiffani Hall

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